Loved and lossed and an army medic
by That kid called Kathryn
Summary: With a useless father. A dying mother. And an overprotective sister. Three new arrivals at the Dumping ground might bring even more trouble Review? Likes? Dislikes?
1. Chapter 1

*Knock knock* No answer *Knock knock* "Come on mam, theres noone here. Let's just go." The sulking barely adult said hopefully.

"No, we need to find a good place for the kids. Or would you rather I just left them with your father" The women may be in a wheelchair struggling to breath but she sure knew how to put her eldest daughter in her place.

The retort that had been on the young womens tongue was snapped back as the door to Elm Tree House was flung open by a flustered looking women not much older than herself. She smiled warmly at them, "Sorry its breakfast time there like a pack of hyenas" her smile dropped as she realised what she had just said.

The women in the wheelchair chuckled lightly at her reaction to her own comment.

"Don't worry about it, I have six children. Its like feeding time at the zoo when we are all around" this earned an eye roll and a "Thanks Mam" from the sulking adult.

This made the other two chuckle. "You must be Mrs Young then, and..." she left the question hanging waiting for a reply. She recieved a dirty look and a grumbled "Alex".

"Right then, I'm Tracy, lets get in out the cold and you can have a look around" she smiled warmly and seemed to be a bubbly kind of person. The type of person Alex would get along with if she didnt work here.

Alex pushed her mothers chair though the doorway, ignoring the offer of help from an overly friendly Tracy. Alex was secretly marveling at the magnitude of the building. Shame it was a dumping ground for the unwanted. She flinched at her own word as she realised that if her mother got her way then her three younger sibling's would be stuck in the place. She couldnt let this happen.

Tracy led them into the office before excusing herself to finish with breakfast and find the head care worker.

Mrs Young was watching her eldest daughter, waiting for the volcano to erupt. It was only a matter of time before it happened again. Alex didn't agree that the best place for the kids when she died would be in a place like Elm Tree. Alex had begged and pleaded with her mother to let her take the kids. Mrs Young wanted her children all to have the best chance. She couldn't leave a 19 year old with three children under the age of 14.

Alex could feel her eyes burning into the back of her skull but refused to meet them. She didn't want to be here. She didn't want her little brother and sisters to ever come here. She had heard stories about care homes. And the children in them. However that was when she was in primary, in secondary she had learnt different. Alex's best friend, Jay, was an ex care kid. She just didn't want her sibling's to have to face the cruelty of children.

One question was eating alex up inside though. A question for her mother? She turned and looked her mother without even trying to keep the hurt out of her eyes and asked;

"Why dont you trust me?"

Before Mrs Young could reassure her child of her reasons, Mike walked into the office ready to give the grand tour.


	2. Chapter 2

Mike looked between the two women and could have cut the tension with a knife, until Mrs Young turned to him, smiled and held out her hand for him to shake.

"Mike Millican" he turned to shake Alex's hand aswell but she was off in her own world and didn't look like she wanted to be disturbed. Alex's mine was racing with guilt, how could she ask her dying mother that? Didn't she have enough to worry about?

"Right lets start in the kitchen and go from there"

Alex snapped back into reality when they were motioning towards the door. Time for the grand tour! Pushing her mother toward said kitchen, Mike gestured towards a room calling it 'the games room'. 'The games room' looked alright, plenty to do, maybe this place wouldn't be half bad Alex thought to herself.

Reaching the kitchen, eleven pairs of eyes turned towards them and stared. Alex felt like the new kid on there first day of school or when she was first introduced to her sqaud for her upcoming trip to Afghanistan. Pushing Mrs Young up to the table, and stealing a sneacky bit of toast in the process, Alex watch as her mother began to engage all the children in conversation about life at Elm Tree. She never let anyone feel left out, the skills of having six children fighting for your attention 24/7.

"Fancy a coffee?" Tracy inquired as Alex lent against the unit next to the kettle. Alex shook her head "Already had my alloted one cup for today"

"One cup?! How do you do it? Im already on my second" Tracy looked genuinely shocked. Alex allowed herself a smile, it always surprised people that did.

"Army. Strict with the intake of caffeine gotta keep fit" Alex frowned at her hand's before looking at Tracy "Whats it like here? Really?"

Tracy paused before saying "Wanna see the rooms?" Alex nodded now knowing for sure that she wouldn't be fed some bullshit story to keep people happy before they abandon there kids.

Alex put her hand on her mothers shoulder before whispering in her ear where she was going. Mrs Young smiled at her daughter and tried to tell her with her eyes that she did trust her but it was just the way it had to be.

As Alex and Tracy climbed the long staircase up, Tracy was chatting away quite merrily about Elm Tree. Telling stories of what happened there and how Mike had been her care worker when she was a kid and how he was great. Wait what?! Alex halted on the stairs and looked up at Tracy

"Your an ex care kid?" Tracy looked back trying to predict the reaction she would get when she admitted it. "Yeah, and I lived here until I was adopted. Its one of the best honestly"

Alex stood for a moment before shrugging and saying "It must be good if you wanted to come back so quick" Alex could see this was a good place, but she didn't want her siblings to become care kids. She would convince her mam the best place was with family. Even if she had to leave her dream job in the army to do it.


	3. Chapter 3

After the grand tour, Tracy thought that Alex may have been warming to the idea of letting her sibling's live at Elm Tree. Alex was even getting along with Tracy, telling her a story from training;

"We were sleeping in the cabins at basic training when, surprise surprise, kit inspection. Its three in the morning, everyone's running to get everything ready in the two minute time limit. Except one guy. He's still tucked away in his sleeping bag, snoring quite merrily to himself. Now when a sergeant comes in the cabin you stand at the end of your bed straightaway, no exceptions."

Tracy was listening intently to see what was going to happen to the snoring man. She had also heard stories about a place she knew nothing about. She had heard of strict punishments and cruel sergeants.

"Anyway, so we are all pretty much ready when the sergeant bursts into the cabin with a face like a smacked arse, to be frank. He was pissed. Our very own sleeping beauty was working on autopilot and had jumped up to the end of his bed. Sergeant goes up to him to see why him kit isn't out and just looks him up and down subtly. The guy looks down, hes still in his sleeping bag." Tracy and Alex erupt into laughter. "You should of seen the sergeant's face. It was hilarious and we couldn't laugh. The guy was made to do laps of the courtyard, still in his sleeping bag, and we got to go back to bed."

"What happened to that guy after that then? Is he still in the army?" Tracy asked. He didn't sound like the best soldier.

"Oh yeah, we call him green bean, he prefers Jay though. And hes a bloody good soldier now, and always makes sure to get out of his sleeping bag before getting up.

Tracy and Alex were still giggling when they arrived back at the kitchen, receiving questioning looks from Mike and Gina (who had arrived while they were up stairs) Tracy headed to the sink.

Alex set sights on her mother, now in deep conversation with Mike and Gina. Alex knelt next to her mother and kissed her cheek. "This is a good place Mam." Mrs Young smiled and thought her daughter had finally come to terms with her decision.

"Before my next round of treatment, the kids can come here to give us both some respite." She paused, taking a deep breath, "Then when I go, the kids will be familiar with this place and can ... settle ... in ... easy?"

Mrs Youngs voice trailed off as she watched her eldest daughter shaking her head. "No, this is a good place but its not family. Its not home. I've made a decision, I'm leaving the army. I'll work as many hours as I have to to support them but they are not becoming care kids." Alex said this quietly but with enough power for her mother the know that she was serious and that she needed knocking down a peg or two.

"You are not leaving the army! That has been your dream for too long.."

"But.."

"I'm not finished. Have you talked to these kids? They are still happy even though they don't have the conventional family that you were very lucky to have. With your father your very lucky not to have grown up here yourself, useless prick." Mrs Young was slowly standing herself up so she could talk, no shout at her daughter at eye level. "And finally they are my children, until you gave birth to them, you do not get to decide where they live after I die." Mrs Young was standing now and could see the hurt that her daughter had been hiding from her by never meeting her eye, at the work die Alex flinched.

"I'm sorry Mam, I only want the best for them." Alex paused, now she was coming to terms with the facts;

1: Her mother was going to die.

2: Her little brother and sisters where going to live at Elm Tree.

3: There was nothing she could do about it.

The facts were terrifying, but so was life and so was her upcoming war zone.


	4. Chapter 4

*3 weeks later*

Alex was driving toward Elm Tree House ready to drop her little brother and sisters off to get settled in. She was driving slower than normal, "Just being cautious" she had told her mother after receiving an odd look. Her Mam knew otherwise but wasn't feeling strong enough to contradict her daughter. Her latest round of treatment had started a week ago and it was knocking her on her ass. They were meant to drop the kids off last week but they kicked up a fuss and got there own way, Alex was secretly happy about this.

Alex pulled the car into the drive, contemplating driving round the block a few times to kill time, but this would just delay the inevitable.

After help the kids out of the car and practically putting her mother in her wheel chair, it had become easier for Alex just to pick her up than struggle with her mothers strength, Alex went and knocked on the door.

Tracy seemed to be on door duty all the time, as here she was again, only this time she was greeted with a smile and a "hey" from Alex instead of a stroppy teenager and a dirty look. Alex had also turned 20 in the past 3 weeks but that still didn't change how she felt about the kids being here. At least Tracy was there to keep an eye on them and make sure Alex was well informed. They had become friends, after seeing each other on a night out, both taking a break from real life.

Alex turned to find the kids had off loaded there bags and were standing with sulking expressions. She started introducing them to Tracy;

"Theres Molly" she pointed to the oldest girl. Molly was tall for 14, and had long brown hair all the way to her waist. She was the most sulky and agreed with Alex that they should be staying with family. Alex smiled sympathetically, reading the girl's mind.

"And that is Robbie and Rachel. Twins, you wouldn't think it though." Robbie and Rachel were polar opposites. Apart from being both 10 they were nothing alike. Robbie had jet black hair, a golden tan and was tall. Rachel had white blond hair and was as pale as a ghost. She was also very short, standing a good head height under her brother. They, however may have been wearing sulking expressions, were excited about living in a house with lots of other people.

Tracy smiled warmly and started chatting to them merrily as she led them into the house. Mrs Young was staying quiet trying to regain her strength from being lifted from her car. She knew she didn't have long, she could feel it, all she could do was reach up weakly and touch her daughters hand as she pushed her in the door. Alex sqeezed her mothers hand and smiled weakly at the top of her head. She also knew that it wouldn't be long, but admitting it to each other would be too easy.

After meeting Mike and Gina, it was time for goodbyes. They had all agreed the kids would settle in better if they left quickly.

Mrs Young gestured to Molly to go in for a hug but Molly shot her an unforgiving look and walked into Alex's arms instead. "Go say goodbye to her" Molly tried to protest but Alex wasn't having it. "This may be one of the last times you see her this healthy, she needs to know you love her and that you are going to be okay. Otherwise she can't leave." Molly was now looking at the ground, tears welling in her eyes. Alex bent down to look her directly in the eyes and said "Hey, hey, look at me. Its going to be okay. You still have me and Robbie and Rachel ... and ... and Mark and David when they come to visit. And your going to be a aunty soon. There is so much to look forward to." Alex gave Molly one final hug and told her to look after Robbie and Rachel before letting her go see her mother.

Alex hugged the twins and told them to be good and to hold off on the pranks for at least a week. They may not say much but they could be mischievous little bugars when they wanted to be.

At last it was time to leave, no tears were shed they would be let out at bedtime, when the lights went out and noone was watching.

Alex pushed her Mam to the car, picked her up and put her inside, then they drove away both leaving a part of themselves behind. They didn't say a word the whole journey but Alex heald her mothers hand as her silent tears crept out and falling at the realisation at what they had just done.


	5. Chapter 5

After Alex and Mrs Young had left, the three youngest Young children were left with a sinking feeling in the pit of there stomachs. They hadn't thought that this would actually happen. They didn't think that they would really be left here.

Molly seeing the looks of horror on her sibling's faces simply put her hands on there shoulders and smiled. She was the oldest out of the three, she had to stick up for them and look after them. That how it worked in the Young family, ever since Dad had moved out, the useless drunk, the oldest took charge.

Mike seeing this display smiled sadly, 'Siblings' he thought 'theres nothing thicker than blood'. Out loud he said "Right Tracy, show them to there rooms then introduce them to the kids" before disappearing back into his office to fill in the mountain of paperwork three new kids brought.

After the door shut and Gina went to check on the rest of the kids, Tracy turns to the new kids and smiled brightly, "Let me show you to your rooms, then you can meet everyone and get settled in."

"Thats alright, we don't need to be settled, we'll be back home in no time" Molly stated cockyly before headed towards the stairs.

Tracy smiled sympathetically at the twins, "Come on then" leading them up stairs. She then continued to chat to the twins about the sleeping arrangements. "So Rachel your in with Tee, she lovely and not much older than you. And Robbie your in with Harry, he's only 8 but he's the closest to your age. Is that alright?" She questioned, turning to the pair, not missing the look that passed between them.

Robbie breathed a "Sure" as a reply. Tracy was going to question them futher, but remembered from past experience that they would never trust her enough to talk to her if she nagged them too much.

"So where am I then?" Molly demanded from the top of the stairs.

Tracy reached her and led her to a door, "Your sharing with Carmen" she said opening a door to a room made entirely out of pink. Molly's jaw dropped. She hated pink. And this was her worst nightmare. "Fuck sake" Molly muttered. Tracy raised her eyebrows at her, "Sorry, is there nowhere else?" She asked hopefully.

"Only Elektra but she doesn't share. Personal reasons" Molly nodded she couldn't argue with that, everyone had problems.

"Fine, I'll suffer pink hell!" She said melodramatically. Tracy rolled her eyes and showed the twins to there rooms, both very subdued now. Thy accepted there rooms with a thank you putting there stuff down in the room not wanting to unpack just yet and followed Tracy downstairs to meet there housemates. Molly was now sulking heavily.

Dragging there feet there arrived at the games room, where all the kids were assembled to meet the new people, it was easier that way. As Tracy dragged Molly, Robbie and Rachel over the threshold, all movement stopped in the room and all eyes were on them. "Carmen?" Tracy waved a girl with long dark hair and dark skin over and introduced her to Molly. Explaining the rooms, Tracy told her to look after Molly, recieving a roll of the eyes from Molly and squeal of delight at having a new roommate from Carmen. Carmen then dragged Molly to sit on the couch next to Rick. Molly cast help me glances at her sibling's until catching sight of Rick.

Tracy called Harry and Tee over and after explain left the kids. They would ask questions and get to know each other better if she wasn't there.

*10 minutes later*

"So why you here? Come on. Everyones got a story. Whats yours?" Johnny was pushing for answers. He had always been the weak one and whenever there was someone new, they needed to know there place.

"Give it a rest, Johnny" That was Liam, acting sheriff. Him and Elektra were oldest so they were in charge, apparently.

"Did your parents get sick of you? Elektra's got sick of her, so thats nothing new round here." " Watch it Johnny" Elektra growled but Johnny wasn't finished and Molly was ready to snap. "What is it then? Been bad? Got kicked out? Or did they just not want you anymore?"

That was it.

Molly moved so fast no one could have stopped her if they had wanted to. Which they didn't. Before anyone could say another word she had Johnny pinned to the floor and was hitting him. Hard.

She didn't stop till Liam and Elektra finally pulled her off him seeing justice had been done. "You've got a good swing, kid." Molly just looked at her hand and whispered "Shit"

At that moment, Mike and Tracy burst into the room. She was in big trouble now.


	6. Chapter 6

"What's going on here?" Mike demanded. Looking at Molly for the answers. Molly stuttered, trying to find a suitable explanation that didn't make it sound like she'd gone syco on Johnnys ass.

Liam jumped in, "Its not her fault. Johnny was being a dick, he wouldn't leave them alone. Molly just put him in his place." Liam and Elektra were grinning, they had finally found someone cool instead of all these little kids.

"That's no excuse. Johnny, Molly your both on kitchen duty for a week." Mike was furious, they'd barely been there half an hour and already there was trouble.

"But Mike, I didn't do anything. She just went syco..."

"Don't make it a month!" Mike silence Johnny quickly before leaving the room. Tracy followed after giving Molly a sympathetic smile.

The room was silent until Molly mumbled "Thanks" to Liam, not looking him in the eye.

"No problem, wanna play pool?" Liam wandered back to Elektra and the pool table and was hold a stick out towards Molly.

"Sure, doubles?" Molly said, taking the stick.

"Yeah, you can have ... Rick. Rick, come play." The rest of the day passed without incident. Rick and Molly beat Liam and Elektra, three games to one. After they demanded a rematch for tomorrow, they were called for tea and Johnny and Molly started there punishment.

The next few week's passed quietly until summer half term and Mrs Youngs and Alex's first visit was due.

Molly, Rachel and Robbie had settled in nicely, and thanks to Molly's outburst the others were wary and no one had bothered them.

Alex pulled into the drive of Elm Tree House, excited to spend the day with her youngest sibling's. Jumping out the car and practically running to the door to knock. Tracy answered the door.

"Hello!" Alex nearly screamed with excitement.

"Hi, your cheerful today. Wheres your mum though?" Tracy inquired not seeing her in the car.

Alex's face fell slightly, "She's not good, couldn't make it out of bed let alone the house. I was thinking of taking the kids to see her, it might be there last chance." Tracy pulled Alex into a hug.

"Yeah, you should do that. Lets go see them then, you must be dying to." Alex went back into cheery mode, telling Tracy about the exciting day she had planned for them, involving the fun fair, candy floss and a kfc.

They walked into the kitchen chatting away about everything that had happened in the the past few weeks including the fight. "I'll talk to her abo..."

Alex was cut off by Robbie and Rachel jumping into her arms, talking way to fast to be understood. Molly was slower to react to her sister entering the kitchen, wanting to seem cool she walked up to Alex. "Hi" She was also nervous. Alex just looked at her before pulling her into a hug.

"Wheres Mum?" Robbie asked having noticed that she hadn't been wheeled in as usual.

"Change of plan, we're going to see her later instead." Alex said as brightly as she could. Molly's face darkened, she knew what it meant. It meant that her Mum was too ill to leave the house, probably couldn't even leave her own bed. "Come on then, we've got lots to do"

Molly went back to her chair with a sour look on her face, receiving sympathetic looks from Elektra and an arm sqeeze from Liam before leaving with her siblings. For a day of 'fun'.

*Later*

Walking into there family home, the four youngest Young children found Jay, Alex's bestfriend and newly instated boyfriend, on leave lounging on the couch.

Alex walked up to him, gave him a quick kiss before asking "How is she?".

Jay responded with an eye roll and replied "Grumpy and bored, she sent me out here because, and I quote, "Will you quit breathing, your annoying me"

Alex giggled, "Typical, I'll go check then the kids can go see her." Alex turned serious. As much as they joked, she wasn't well and this was a good day.

Alex walked into the makeshift hospital room that used to be her mothers bedroom. Checked all the machines before wakin her mother up the see her children. They hadn't told the youngest yet but Mrs Young's latest treatment had been stopped but the doctors and she been sent home to die. They hadn't been happy but it was for the best, nothing was working. It was happening too fast though. They were becoming half orphans to fast.

Mrs Young smiled at her oldest daughter before breaking into a coughing fit. Dying wasn't easy. After some water, she was ready to see her children.

Alex brought them in. Robbie and Rachel bounced up to the bed, hugging there mother gently as even they could see that she was fragile. Molly hung back, she seemed to be doing this alot today but now she wasn't trying to be cool. She was scared and worried. What if this was the last time and she said something stupid. What if she let the anger she felt at her mother for leaving them ruin this moment.

Mrs Young looked at Molly in turmoil. Molly snapped back to the moment and went to sit at the end of her mothers bed.

"Hi" Molly smiled, letting all worrys slip after and trying to enjoy the finish time she would see her mother.


	7. Chapter 7

Several weeks after the three youngest Young children saw there mother for the last time, there was a week of constant rain.

Alex woke up every morning wishing for God to stop pissing on them. It made everything ten times more difficult. Go out the door and getting into the car resulted in getting soaked. Jay was living with her at her childhood home, he made things easier. But he was going back to war soon, where Alex would be if she didn't have to look after Mrs Young.

Molly was finding the weather particularly difficult as whenever it was thunder and lightning she was use to sleeping with either her Mam or Alex. She could do neither at the dumping ground, instead she lay awake or went into the kitchen and sat for hours until everyone else woke up.

One stormy Thursday, Alex was awoken by a load clap of thunder and couldn't drift off again. Being careful not to wake Jay, Alex left there bed and went to make a drink in the kitchen. She noticed that even at night, the house was too quiet without the children. She sighed. However through the silence she could here a noise. A long noise. Like a beep but strung out. Alex's eyes widened in realisation, as she dashed up stairs to her mothers bedroom.

Also on this stormy Thursday, Molly had woken with an aching in he chest, as if something was missing but she couldn't figure out what. She took off down stair, not caring about being particularly quiet, the thunder was loud enough. Whist fixing a drink she sensed rather than heard Rachel and Robbie come into the kitchen. Turning to check, she started to make them one aswell.

"Why are you two up?" Molly asked as she placed the mugs down.

"Couldn't sleep, got this feeling" Robbie replied, feeling uneasy. He had the ache aswell, so did Rachel. What was going on. They weren't that close. The siblings discussed this until morning. They could understand the twins but why Molly aswell, something was wrong.

They wouldn't find out what until there was a knock on the door in the morning.

*At the Young's*

Jay was sat with Alex curled up on his lap in her father's chair that faced out onto the garden. Tears had finally stopped crashing down her face, she had none left. Her mother had died during the night and they had just taken her body away.

It wasn't raining anymore. The sun was shining as the storm had broken. But Alex couldn't feel any relief over this, all she was think was she needed to tell the kids. She'd already rang Mark and David, they were coming home later that day, but the kids needed to be told.

Jay was holding the women he loved as she was deep in thought. He was going to have to leave soon, back to war. Maybe he could get compationate leave for a few weeks then go back. Give her time to get back on her feet. She wouldn't have long though anyway,they were just waiting until her mother was either well enough to not need a full time carer or until she died. It was inevitable that Alex would get a call soon.

Alex broke her thought, stood up and pulled Jay up with her to go get dressed. It was time.

Jay drove. Alex couldn't. She may not have any tears left but that didn't stop the dry sobbing. Jay held her hand, the same way she had with Mrs Young when they had dropped the kids off. This only made things worse ...and better at the same time. The comforting action helped but was a reminder.

Arriving at the dumping groung, Jay game her hand a squeeze and a comforting hand before getting out and opening Alex's door. They stood together hand in hand as they knock, waitimg for someone to answer. Tracy did, smiling like always. Alex just shook her head and said "She's gone, we need to tell the kids." And let Tracy pull her into a hug and lead them to a room.

They waited what seemed like an eternity before the door finally opened to reveal Mike with the kids behind him. He left them alone as Rachel and Robbie practically jumped onto Alex enveloping her in a hug. Molly stood by the door. She knew. She didn't want to hear it.

Alex looked up at Molly ready to speak but before she could Molly interrupted bluntly. "She dead isn't she." Alex just nodded in reply.

Molly looked at the floor before whispering "Okay" and running from the room. Leaving Alex to stare after her and to comfort two now hysterical 10 year olds.

Molly didnt stop running until she reached the garden. She didn't stop when Mike and Tracy called her, not when she went through the kitchen and Liam grabbed her arm and stared deep into her eyes searching for the problem. She didn't stopped until she was far enougn away to break down alone.

Please R&R


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